Temporary Discord
by uebermensch
Summary: Henry 'fesses up, to a long line of sins. The words take place after he rejects Eliza at karaoke night (1x10).


_**TEMPORARY DISCORD**_

It's Tuesday somewhere in the world.

Rated K+. As long as I continue writing, this is an enthusiastic 'thank-you-selfie' to "Selfie", along with gratitude to EK, KG, and JC. This story is a 1-part stand-alone, whose words include events up to and including 1x10, and beyond the episode's final scene.

Summary: Henry `fesses up, to a long line of sins.

* * *

"Oh baby, baby, it's a wild world  
It's hard to get by just upon a smile  
Oh baby, baby it's a wild world  
I'll always remember you like a child, girl ..."

Another verse. The chorus, again, one more time for good measure; the last line burned into memory. His heart ripped out, out into the open as a pile of ashes.

When he stopped, he opened his eyes. For a moment, he stared out into the room, briefly blinded by the lights. He could tell by various movements there were a few staff members staying late to tidy up.

Saperstein was at the bar, right where Henry had left him. Saperstein looked serious and thoughtful, in wild contrast to his Terence Trent D'Arby wig and costume.

Taking a seat next to his boss, Henry raised his hand to the bartender, indicating a request for another drink.

"You know, Henry, you've been doing tremendous work with Eliza lately, but this ...", Saperstein waved his hand at him and into the air. "This ... this **thing** with you and Eliza ..."

"Nothing's happening between Eliza and me ..." _And after tonight, I've all but guaranteed nothing ever will_, Henry thought darkly.

"Well then, let me tell you another story, another tale as old as time. Girl meets boy at work. Boy helps girl rediscover her true self. Girl makes real friends, girl becomes an even more valued member of the company. Boy breaks girl's heart. Girl goes back to the safe banal behavior of old."

"Sir ..."

"Henry, I don't have to tell you how **this** story ends, should it continue this way."

The bartender placed a drink in front of Henry. With a nod of thanks, Henry picked up the tumbler, taking a big gulp. He rubbed his face with his free hand, suddenly aware of the day's exhaustion. "No, sir, you don't have to tell me ..."

"But I'm gonna, anyway. Boy fixes problem. Boy **FIXES** problem ..."

"Sir, I ..." _I made a mess of things._ Henry's face crumpled in misery, finding difficulty in continuing his train of thought.

"What's going on between you two?"

"**Nothing** is going on, sir ..."

"Son, I wasn't born yesterday. I'm asking, not as your boss, but as your friend. This is completely off-the-record. I know it's personal, and I know you're very protective of your personal life. But you and I, we go back to the days of our 'elephant' ..."

Years past when the orange vitamin was merely an idea, before they struck gold with their trusty tablet.

"Henry, I'd like to help. You can trust me."

He looked up at Sam for a moment, and made his decision.

Over the next half-hour, Henry began from the very start, and told Sam about meeting Eliza the first time, and the social etiquette lessons he'd been providing over the last few months. The culmination of mixed messages and bad timing had occurred in the last 24 hours, when she admitted to having feelings for him. His fear about a loss of control had resulted in a knee-jerk rejection of Eliza, much to Sam's disapproving look.

The way Henry viewed the facts was as clear as the glass in his hand: he had lost both Eliza and Julia in one fell swoop.

Losing Julia wasn't easy, but he realized now the termination of their relationship was inevitable. Familiar and safe, but ultimately, boring. Like a bowel movement ...

Losing Eliza, however, was something entirely different. The cut, much deeper; the loss, devastating. How only a short time after he had rejected Eliza to leave her on her own did the truth of his cowardice sear those facts into his brain.

Take away the irritating impersonal aspects of social media, and her razor-sharp perception was left to train on him, like moth to flame.

He treated her the way she deserved. She loved him because she found her way back to her true self.

But Henry **had** lied to Eliza, and she had been spot on. Julia had stormed off, mad at him. And he didn't go after Julia, because what Eliza said was crystal clear and true: that he had loved her all along.

He hadn't vacated the premises after all. Under the stage's bright lights, any person singing up front would be unable to see across to the back of the room, where he hid in the shadows.

Where he had caught the first notes of her song.

Where he witnessed in bright technicolor the pain he had caused.

He had hurt her deeply. At that very moment of his horror, he didn't know, honestly did not know how he, how they would go on.

In a different universe where he didn't give a quack, he would've marched up to the stage, asked for forgiveness, and shown her the truth. But he did no such thing. He stood paralyzed, watching her. As seconds dragged into minutes, his instinct had not been to fight, but for flight.

He hadn't waited for the premature end to the song. He fled, away from the building, away from the office, away from her, away from guilt and pain. He wrapped himself in the overcoat, and walked to clear his mind. And he had walked some more.

By the time Henry returned, the karaoke party had ended, and most had left for the night. Just as he sat down by the bar with a drink in hand, his phone rang. The decision to ignore her call had all but sealed his fate with Julia.

Sam could easily tell by the way from Henry's story that Eliza wasn't the only one undergoing changes. Sam hadn't been kidding: Henry was not only more life-like, but much happier with Eliza around.

"If I were her," Henry continued. "And I'd been rejected, I might've gone back to a place most familiar and safe."

"So ... she's gone back ..."

"She's gone back to Freddy, yes. I'm certain of it." The thought and his verbalization struck him hard.

"Oh. What are you going to do next?"

"What can I do? Nothing, at least for now. I'm still her friend, or at least, I hope I still am."

"She'll eventually see you weren't ready."

"Maybe, But the thing, the thing that's killing me is the thought I've done irreparable harm to our friendship."

"Yes, Eliza will be mad at you, but it's only temporary, son. Look, it's abundantly clear to Yasmin and me, that you two care a lot about each other. Despite what you've done, and yes, there's been damage, you need to have faith and trust in what you two have built as friends. It's a place where you can both start again ... something like ..."

And Sam began quietly, echoing his burst in the board room.

"'... and we build it up, we build it up ... now we're solid, solid as a rock' ..."

Henry grinned, despite himself. "Ashford and Simpson. Yes, sir."

"You and Eliza would've done a good job with 'Solid'".

"I believe you're correct, but I also believe this year would've been 'wrong place, wrong time'."

Saperstein nodded. "You realize, Henry, next year when we have our karaoke night again, I'm going to try something new ... something like ... mandatory duets. Oh yes, I like it ..."

"It's a great idea, sir."

"And by then, you two will have patched things up, though I'm secretly hoping for more from the two of you ..."

"Sir!"

"Fine, fine. I'll let you off the hook. For now. But I won't promise I'm not going to put Yasmin on your case."

"Great. Before long, I'll have the whole office wondering and betting when Eliza and I will become a couple ..."

In an instant, Saperstein drummed up a delicious idea, about starting a bet when Henry and Eliza would be an 'official couple'. "I'll have to talk to Raj about pre-signing the paperwork for the two of you. And as for the bet, an 'over-under' or 'before-after' to some future date, say, three months from today ..."

"Sam ... no ..."

"Ah, Henry, I'm just messing with you! Are you considering telling Eliza you're no longer with Julia?"

"I'll tell her eventually. But not right now, because I don't see the point, especially with the appalling way I've treated her."

"Yes well, at least you've quickly recognized the error of your ways."

"Perhaps. I just wish I could turn back the clock. I shouldn't have made her wait for an answer."

"I was going to say, Henry. You **know** how you feel: it's either 'yes' or 'no'. What point was there in making her wait for more than a day?"

"I was selfish, and essentially, I took her for granted. And truthfully, I had difficulty putting things together in my head ... and I'd been stalling."

"That's not like you."

"No, it isn't, sir. But when it comes to my feelings and the way I feel about her, all practice and reason go out the window."

"That's not such a bad thing, Henry. But just so we're clear: do you know how you feel about her now?"

"Yes, I do. I guess one good thing to come out of tonight is she forced me to confront how I feel about her."

"And that is ...?"

"... That when she's with me I've never felt more alive ... or aggravated." His smile softened the severe adjective, thinking about all the ways she drove him mad crazy. "That we can be more than colleagues and friends. That I want us to be something more. That I'm still crazy enough to believe someone like her would want to be with someone like me."

"Good on you," Sam replied, patting Henry on the shoulder. "There'll be some tough times ahead. You know that, don't you?"

"Yes, sir, I do."

"All right then." Sam stood and pushed off from the bar, brushing stray dreadlocks from his face. "I've got to get going. Yasmin's waiting for me downstairs."

"Oh yes, of course. Please give Yasmin my regards." Henry stood and extended his hand. "Thank you."

"Aw, come here, son ..." Arms open wide, Sam stepped towards Henry.

"Please don't kiss me, sir!"

"Hah! Not this time ..." Sam wrapped Henry in a big Saperstein hug. Henry froze for a moment, but he relaxed, accepting the contact and kind gesture from his friend.

With a sympathetic glance towards his younger counterpart, Sam released Henry. "You'll be all right?"

"I'll be fine."

"We don't have any pressing matters tomorrow. Why don't you take the day off?"

As much as Henry knew how much work defined him, Sam's idea was starting to sound good. "But don't we ..."

"No 'buts', Henry. And by the way, that wasn't a request." Sam smiled, not unkindly.

"I'll stay away from the office tomorrow."

"Go visit the Getty Center. Or go up to Griffith; I know how much you enjoy spending time in the hills. Good night, Henry."

"You too, sir."

He watched Sam say some final words to the remaining staff, before disappearing from view.

Henry reached over, and downed the remainder of his drink.

_'In vino veritas,' or perhaps, 'in good scotch lies golden truth'_, he thought.

He returned to his office, closing the door behind him. He shook off his jacket and removed his tie, placing them on a chair. He set his alarm for 4am, so he could sleep off the booze and he could leave before the first staff arrived at 6. He dug out a spare blanket and lay on his couch, hands folded behind his head.

He breathed deeply, looking at the patterns on the ceiling.

He thought about his desk. A place which in the past held little meaning, other than work. That was no longer the case.

It's where they met the first time.

It's where she put to him an ultimatum.

It's where countless conversations between them took place.

It's where he and Eliza agreed he would help her.

It's where he saw some of those changes take place.

It's where he unknowingly let her in, and he had fallen hard for her.

It's where he failed and she called him chicken.

It's where he decided he'd make a change.

A riot of curly red locks.

A wave, gently riding on her soft full lips.

A deep sea of round knowing eyes.

He **had** blinked, but it'd all been figurative. He could no longer deny or contain the lie to himself: he loved Eliza Dooley.

He finally grasped what they'd meant to each other the entire time. They'd been circling another in imperfect harmony, and she'd bravely changed course to seek him out. It was up to him to break the dissonance, to find his way back, back into her warm fiery-red cotton-candy orbit.

Closing his eyes, he understood there was work to be done, work done on his part to meet her halfway. He hoped he wasn't too late.

* * *

Comments? Love `em, please put `em down below. John Cho's 2-minute cover of "Wild World" is at soundcloud dot com /user614700472/wild-world-henry-v1


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